Why I Rejected Christianity: Sexuality
I was trying to think up new ideas for articles on this blog, and I realized that whilst I have talked at great length about what I believe as an atheist and why, I haven’t really covered why I rejected Christianity. So this is the first article in a new series.
Whilst I can’t speak for all atheists who have deconverted from Christianity, these are my personal reasons for losing my faith. I was brought up in a semi-religious family and attended two Church of England schools, one of which was situated right next to the church.
Sexuality
One of the main reasons I think I rejected Christianity (as well as other religions) is the issue of sexuality. I was brought up under the Church of England, and whilst I wasn’t a fundamentalist per se, I did believe that women were responsible for all sin. Whilst I had no idea that homosexuals existed (I was younger than 10), if I had met one of been told about one, I would probably have been disgusted.
Of course in a secular place like England you cannot hold these views rationally for long. I eventually became very anti-sexist as I learned more about biology and humanity as a species. Science dictates that whilst the differences between male and female are distinct, there are “advantages” to both. Without women, we wouldn’t have children, and their minds are more adept to solving complicated puzzles faster. Men on the other hand have the obvious higher average strength and height, a gift from years of Evolution. They are also more adept at visualizing problems in their head without the need for paper.
So really, for the church to claim that women were responsible for all mortal sin was rather stupid. Even if you believe the Genesis story, it was the snake who tricked Eve by using her “God-given” ability of free-will. This I saw as pretty unfair; giving someone free-will and then punishing them for using it? Men are as inquisitive and gullible as women. I have no doubt that, left alone in the Garden of Eden, Adam would have succumbed to curiosity instead of Eve. Eve is merely the innocent victim of prejudice.
I grew up in a changing England. Secularism was on the rise, and was challenging some of the churches views. Women were gradually being appointed as clergy even thought it is against Biblical teaching:
But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. [1 Tim 2:12]
This isn’t the only quote against women. The entire Bible is full of misogynistic writings.
The popular British comedy “Vicar of Dibley” was a turning point for many people on the views of women clergy. In it, a traditional English village sees the death of it’s elderly male pastor, and is shocked when the replacement is a women. After initial discomfort, the vicar turns out to be an enormous success.
Of course this change didn’t do anything but start hacking away at the bonds between me and Christianity. Although I thought that women had every right to be clergy, how could people ignore what was written in the Bible to do so? I now see the Bible for what it is of course, which is a book full of hatred, oppression, and lies.
Now that the gender side of sexuality is covered, I’ll move onto the sexual orientation side. I’m a partially open bisexual man. I say “partially” since I haven’t technically come out to my parents or family members, but it’s not like I keep it a secret. My facebook profile lists me as interested in both men and women, and although I have never dated a man, I have felt sexually attracted to some. I tend to date women because I find them far more interesting than any man, and possibly because I’m not a 50/50 bisexual, but probably more aimed towards a 80/20 in favour of women. Put simply, there are more types of women I am attracted to than men.
The issue of sexuality wasn’t really addressed at a young age, although I learned of homosexuality when I was about 8. At the time I found it repulsive, the very thought of a man even kissing another man was sickening. I was later bullied at school and called “gay” as a derogatory term, nothing to do with my actual sexuality, so that might have prompted an adverse reaction to it.
What really changed my minds about homosexuality was actually meeting gay couples, understanding that their love is very real, and in most circumstances their relationship is much more loving than any heterosexual one. The divorce rates between homosexual marriages are much lower than heterosexual marriages, and for some good reasons:
- More respect is held for each partner, due in some way to the same gender status is society.
- This leads to better sex lives, with less adultery committed.
- Both partners are valued equally (as explained in #1).
- Longevity because of devotion, not church sanction.
- Which means the marriage is bound by passion, not tradition.
- Lower instances of abuse because of shared values.
Contrary to popular opinion, homosexual couples are almost perfect for raising children because of the loving environment they give. It seems odd then, that there is such hatred of homosexuals in religion. If there is anything I hate more about homophobic religious fundamentalists, it is people who say that the Bible is misinterpreted and that “gays are fine”. These people are the ignorant ones. The Bible states very clearly in numerous places that homosexuality is a sin and an abomination. Such twisting of words might look like people are trying to be more liberal about their religion, but in reality they are being hypocritical.
I think a clear message should be sent to people: If your holy book says homosexuals are an abomination, then they are according to your religion. If you disagree, have the guts to admit that your religion is not the word of God, and don’t try to warp it’s meaning. What is the point in believing in a God who says something one day but then changes his mind years down the line? I’m sorry, but I thought your God was omnipotent and omniscient, and such a thing could never happen according to those definitions.
So hopefully I’ve managed to enlighten a few people on one of the many reasons I rejected Christianity. I’ll write more on this topic soon.
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